Not Me! Monday

So here we are again folks. Another Not Me! Monday. In past Mondays, I have fallen victim to something called 'writer's block' where I can't think of a single thing to divulge to my wonderful audience. But this week, I am going to try my extra hardest to see what my brain can come up with, embarrassing or not.

1. Let's start with Saturday night. Jarred and I went on a nice date to my favorite steakhouse and then went to the mall to SHOP! I didn't go into a certain well-known 'undies' store and begin to have a conversation with one of the salesgirls about whether the 5 for $25 or 3 for $30 was a better deal, considering the latter were better quality undies. She didn't look at me like I had 5 heads and say, "Sweetie, I don't work here, I work at Macy's."

Oh.

I'm glad I was talking about underwear to a complete stranger. I'm glad she knows now that a random girl likes seamless microfiber better than cotton. Eesh.

2. Considering I woke up much later on Saturday afternoon morning (yeah...) in no way did I have chocolate cake for breakfast. That would be terrible of me and I can control my cravings better than that. Who do you take me for?

And I'm not eyeing the cake on the table right now. I just had a protein filled breakfast of an egg and cheese sandwich, so I wouldn't want to mess up my diet further by taking a slice.

3. I did not almost kick the girl doing my pedicure in the face on Thursday. She was digging into my toenail with the file and I didn't want to grab the thing from her and shove it up her nose.

Sympathize with me. My poor little toesies hurt now. But they are so pretty. So thanks lady. I know beauty hurts for real now.

4. I totally in no way went to the mall and spent hard earned money on more clothes and another pair of flip flops this weekend. And this wasn't the trip I made with J after the steakhouse either.

In my defense, the guy from the shoe store had told me they were getting in a new shipment of TOMS and he had me come by and look. Well, I mean, he didn't drag me into the store. I'll admit I went willingly.

I found a new fabulous pair of TOMS, but I was good and told him I would have to wait until my next paycheck. So I'd come back in 2 weeks. But then I saw them. The cutest pair of flip flops. They are Teva's Mush sandal. Perfection. I didn't drool all over them. I left the store empty-handed nonetheless.

But I didn't drag Jarred out to the mall again the next day to buy the sandals just because I had convinced myself I couldn't live without them.

5. And I am totally not going to Old Navy to get another pair of sandals just so I can finally have a 'legal' one to wear to work.